Autumn Songs

Dua musim gugur sebelumnya, saya selalu ditemani dengan perasaan melankolis dari setiap elemen yang muncul selama musim ini. Udara dingin dengan sebuah aroma khas. Seperti bau asap dari cerobong rumah yang sedang menyalakan perapian untuk menghangatkan penghuninya di saat musim dingin. Warna dedaunan yang perlahan berubah menjadi kuning, merah, kuning kemerahan, merah kekuningan, hijau kemerahan, hijau kekuningan, kuning kecoklatan. Suara nyaring para dedaunan yang jatuh di jalan dan menetap di sana hingga kering lalu terinjak oleh kaki - kaki atau tergilas oleh ban - ban kendaraan roda empat dan roda dua.

Tapi kali ini, perasaan itu hanya datang sesaat dan sesekali saja. Bukan, bukan berarti saya tidak menikmati atau mensyukuri datangnya musim ini. Mungkin karena terlalu banyak hal yang ada di dalam pikiran saya saat ini sehingga saya jarang terbawa oleh suasana melankolis musim gugur. Dan terlepas dari foto - foto di blog ini yang terlihat warna - warni, sebenarnya cukup sulit mencari pepohonan kuning dan merah di Rotterdam. Perlu keberuntungan lebih untuk bisa menemukan tempat yang memiliki tipe pepohonan tersebut, karena sisanya didominasi oleh pepohonan hijau dan hijau kekuningan. Dan sama seperti musim gugur sebelum - sebelumnya, saya ingin memberi beberapa lagu yang lagi saya suka putar berulang kali di Spotify.

Early in the morning, 

Right before the break of day.

Lying here beside you, 

Trying to think of something to say.

You're gotta have to leave soon. 

So I'll give you this heart as well.

It means I'm gonna miss you. 

Every time.

'Cause I can't get used to letting you go.

When the tears roll down you face.

Let me tell you darling, 

We're gonna find a place.

Where we can lay low. 

Where we can get high.

Where we can run away, 

We can go today.

We can leave the world behind.

So honey, let's go. 

Let's do what we lost.

Do all the things that we've been dreaming of.

(Lay Low - David Benjamin)

Rows and flows of angel hair, 
And ice cream castles in the air,
And feather canyons everywhere.
I've looked at clouds that way.

But now they only block the sun,
And rain and snow on everyone.
So many things I would have done, 
But clouds got in my way.

I've looked at clouds from both sides now.
From up and down and still somehow,
It's cloud's illusions I recall.
I really don't know clouds at all.

I've looked at love from both sides now.
From give and take and still somehow.
It's love's illusions I recall.
I really don't know love at all.

Tears and fears and feeling proud, 
To say "I love you" right out loud.
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds, 
I've looked at life that way.

(Both Sides Now - Years & Years)

It's in smiles, 

A lover's eyes. 

It's in joy when in needs,

No disguise. 

It's in fairy tales and lullabies,

Stories that hold you. 

It's in hugs, 

Apple pies. 

It's in love that grows old,

 But never dies. 

These things, 

Make me glad to be alive. 

We will never be able to treasure life enough. 

When death comes, my heart is overcome. 

We will never be able to treasure life enough. 

When death comes, I start looking up. 

And it's in fall, 

When we are driving down the road,

And start to sing. 

And falling leaves,

And clear blue sky, 

And all the things we have made it through.... 

Dear heart stays sober, 

It's only October. 

(October - Gray)